EDC Writing – Believing Sight Unseen
WIP – Their Days: Sam & Erin's story – an internet liaison // EDC Shorts: Poetry & Lines
I’ll be taking a break from blogging for a few weeks – posting on this blog and at the Go Dog Go Cafe – and interaction with other blogs.
I’m fine, but need to step back from blogging life for a while to finish a couple of writing projects; one a novella, the other a book of lines and poetry.
My best wishes to you all – good luck with all you do – I’ll be back for sure!
Eric
Our perfect days to come have to start with one, the day we say hello, the day that we begin, to talk a while and feel, all that we’ve begun is real, to let what we have grow, through looks and smiles, and hand holds, and if our chemistry is right, as I believe it might, then we’ll be all we’ve ever said, the two of us, behaving naturally, instinctively, behind closed doors, the bedroom, the sofa, the kitchen table, up against the hall wall, and as I know you have a hankering, al fresco too, the touch of grass upon your skin, words undressed as us, all we are exposed …
Wednesday
Sam
Good to hear I’m home? You’re completely confusing me! I’m trying to help you, but you don’t seem to need it? I thought we had something, yet you can’t wait even a day for me. You’ve got me thinking!
Erin
Can you just slow down a bit? I’m feeling really overwhelmed with all that’s going on and I need to be with someone I know, that’s all. Look, Sam, you are getting too heavy too fast, and I can’t cope right now, okay.
Sam
I really feel for you, you know that. Whatever’s going on in your life right now, little if anything, seems good. I can’t say I understand because you’ve still not told me anything. We have something good, don’t we?
Erin
I really don’t know what we have if I’m being honest. I think I have feelings for you, but I can’t deal with them right now. I’m feeling pressured and I hate that. You’re truly a great guy, but I just feel, and I’m so sorry to say this, that you are suffocating me. I just want things to slow way down. Please give me space to sort myself out. Sorry.
Thursday
Sam
Where did that come from? It was only a couple of days ago that you said you don’t want to be given space and now I’m suffocating you? Not for the first time, you’re not making much sense to me. We both know that we need to move forward and for me it needs to be this week.
Erin
Okay, well, I am reading that and thinking you’re not really as into this as I am. Yes, I know that we have to move to the next step and that’s what we’re trying to do, aren’t we? If only it could be a bit easier, that’s all!
Sam
I sense real desperation in you which makes me so annoyed with myself that I have clearly failed to earn your trust. Such a shame as talking to me would be easier than you seem to think. Believe it or not I’m the kind of man who listens, the kind of man you’ll have never spoken to before.
Erin
I do find it hard to open up about problems, but that’s because I’ve had it thrown back in my face before. I’m sure you are trustworthy, but maybe it is my own courage that’s the problem?
♦
Thursday
Sam
Erin, what can I say? This is how my life is. I thought you knew that from the start. I have no ties, no responsibilities to anyone, and I come and go as I’m asked. I can’t just stop, even if I wanted to. Look, I’ve been straight with you – where I’m going is far too remote to be able to log on to a site like this. I know I’m sounding blunt. I don’t mean to, but I do need you to realise we’ll need to move off of here if you want the chance of a relationship with me.
Erin
I can’t believe you sent me that. You sound so cold and detached, and again you are trying to impose your will on me. It seems I got you wrong and you are not the man I imagined you to be. Oh well.
Sam
Oh, Erin, why be like this? I just want to have a way of keeping in touch with you, that’s all. Is that really too much to ask? Cold and detached? You must be psychic, as I will be, but not in the way you think. I fly to Reykjavik on Sunday then on to Greenland. The weather is bad right now, but if we can the plan is to move on to the ice cap by Wednesday. So hostile to begin with, then sheer beauty shining through. How about you?
Erin
My head is pounding, Sam. I can’t take all of this in. I am so unsure what to do, I can’t make sense of some of these feelings I have right now. I can’t stop thinking about you. I keep saying it, but I’ve never known a man like you. I didn’t even know men like you existed. I’m almost too scared to ask, but why do you have to be out there?
Friday
Sam
I’m walking in the rain alone my head bowed heavy with my thoughts, wanting to tell you more than I can, and I will when we are more secure than we are now. There are plenty of men like me and women too. I’ll have one with me – she goes everywhere I go, keeps me out of trouble, so no need to be scared for me. I’m drenched to the skin but do not want to go in, so I’ll stay outside and steam a while with my thoughts of being inside with you.
Erin
In a minute I’m going to wake up and find that this is all a dream. No man has ever turned me on the way you do. My imagination is going wild. I need you to go in, to feel how wet I am too.
Sam
Imagine… you walk towards me hands outstretched. I mirror you. Our fingers touch, hands connect, arms enfold, and we embrace. You nuzzle my neck, and my eyes stream dewdrops on your hair. You look up, your eyes glisten, and moisten me. Our warmth creates a mist, mysterious, breathed in, every tear of joy shed condensed within. Lips dare to kiss, tongue tips touch, silently saying so much. We squeeze up tight, spellbound…we say hello.
Erin
You have made my skin come out in goose bumps. I so want the first time we meet to be like this – I so want to be squeezed up close to you.
♦
Monday
Sam
I didn’t see much point in responding yesterday – we’d have only ended up saying things we’d regret and made things even more difficult than they are. My instincts don’t usually let me down, but you are virgin territory to me. What I felt was a little nudge you took as a hefty push. I can see I will need to handle you with the most gentle and sensual touch.
Erin
You are so good at this, aren’t you, making me feel bad for what I said then making me laugh? ‘Virgin territory’, you silly sod, but then you get me wondering just how unique a man like you could be?
Sam
You don’t have to wonder, Erin, but you’ll have to wait to find out as you can’t make this week. I’ll be off again from next Monday for a couple of weeks, maybe longer – it’s hard to tell until I get out there. What’s keeping you so busy that you don’t even have time for a coffee? I’m not having a dig, I’d genuinely like to know.
Erin
You may not think you are having a dig, but it feels a bit like it to me. It’s obviously not helping with you going away again – it’s putting pressure on both of us. I know you are just wanting coffee and a chat to begin with. I think that is a great idea, but please can we keep chatting on here and sort something out when you get back?
Sam
You’re probably right. I guess we could wait a few weeks to meet, but something has to happen. A phone call, or even an e-mail? Surely you can see that?
Erin
I know what you are saying, but it is different for women and I’m not comfortable giving out my personal information until we meet. I’ve had a bad experience in the past and I’m now extra cautious, so I hope you can understand my need to feel safe. It’s not you, it’s just the way I am.
Wednesday
Sam
Hello, Erin, I was in London yesterday and what with one thing and another I didn’t have time to message you, so don’t go thinking I didn’t understand what you said. I did and I’m okay with it. Time is getting very tight for me – I haven’t done a field trip quite like this one for a while, and let’s just say the preliminaries are quite demanding. At least I passed the medical yesterday. How’s life for you?
Erin
Oh my goodness, you really are going away, aren’t you? I hadn’t really taken it in to be honest. Is it really going to be for weeks? I don’t know what to say. I’m quite upset. You’ll think me silly, but I can’t bear the thought of not hearing from you. Please don’t leave me alone on here.
♦
Thursday
Sam
Hi, Erin, it was manic out here on Wednesday – we wrapped everything up at about 9 pm, then our Belgian colleagues found a restaurant for about twenty of us to literally take over – obligatory fillet steaks and pommes frites, and beer, and more beer, and… well, let’s just say I’m glad it’s a short flight home today. Blushing reveals a lot about you – your sensitivity, your barely hidden vulnerability, your ability to show emotions, and apparently those that blush make great lovers! I may not be blushing, but I’m certainly smiling as I sign off for now.
Erin
How do you do this, Sam? You talk to me as if we have known each other for years not just a couple of weeks and with a sore head too. Some of the things you say I’d feel uncomfortable about with anyone else, but somehow it seems alright with you. So you don’t blush? Well, I’ll have to see what I can do about that when you get back.
Friday
Sam
I send my gifts to you as words:
Flowers, their fragile beauty incomparable to yours
A classic fragrance, subtle, heaven scent as you
Lingerie, sensual, your body to adorn
Chocolate, to brush your lips, to taste sublime within
My thoughts, stroked from my heart to yours.
Happy Birthday, Erin, I wish I could give you more.
Erin
Oh my goodness, Sam, you’ve brought tears to my eyes. I’m so flattered and overwhelmed by your lovely words. I wish I were with you right now to show you how very grateful I am. How could a girl want more than you have given me? Thank you so much, I’m almost speechless. Things like this don’t happen to me.
Saturday
Sam
Hi, Erin, just a quick one. I stayed at a friend’s last night, but I’m now back home to a pile of junk mail through my letterbox, a misnomer if ever there was one. Made me think back to my youth, and a teenage girlfriend I’d met on holiday. Her letters I remember most – she was the first girl to show feelings for me through her written words. Decades on, another world, and written words connect us too – pull us close enough to touch, to feel something inside. Have a great night out with your friends – short skirts, low tops and killer heels, or have I got you wrong?
Erin
Your messages take me to another world. Each one shows me a bit more of you. I love it, I really do. If I tried to do the same mine would be rubbish next to yours. If that’s your quick one, Sam, I’m going to be a very lucky girl – and yes, we will be girly girls tonight!
Sunday
Sam
Erin, you stir so many things in me, we have to meet and soon. Let’s try to sort something out for next week.
Erin
I know that we need to meet, and I want to, it’s not just a case of having to, okay? We just need to get the timing right and I’m sorry, but next week is not right for me. I can’t help it, I just have too much on. I had no idea we’d get this close this quick when we started this.
Sam
The thing is, Erin, and I’d thought you would have realised this, I’m only in the UK next week then I’ll be away for a while and won’t be able to keep in touch. Well, at least not on a site like this. Look, I’ll be in London on Tuesday. Why don’t we meet up at lunchtime, just a quick coffee if you like? It would be so good to see you before I go.
Erin
Excuse me, what kind of message is that? Just what am I supposed to have realised? You’re the one who needs to look, Sam, I’ve told you I can’t meet up with you next week. It feels to me as though you are trying to tell me what to do and I don’t like it. I think you are being very unfair pushing me like this.
♦
He’d go anywhere with her … she’d go with anyone but him.
[@EDC_Writing #SlapDashSat – 12th May 2018]
This is the first post of the revised and edited version of ‘Believing Sight Unseen: Their Days’ – written in message scenes, replacing previous posts in narrative/message format.
Sunday
Sam:
Sites like this are not my thing, yet somehow your photo appeared to me. By chance, by fate, I wouldn’t know. All I know is that as I go about my daily life my thoughts keep coming back to you. What can I say, other than you’ve captivated me – I just had to sign up, just had to say hello. I’m Sam and spellbound by your smile.
Erin:
Oh my goodness, do you really mean that? I’m Erin, by the way.
Sam:
Hello, Erin, l can’t quite believe you got in touch. I’ve not done anything like this before so I’ll just be me and write the way I feel. Is that alright with you?
Erin:
I like the way you write – it’s refreshing to chat to a guy who seems interested in me. Most men on here are only interested in one thing!
Sam:
There must be plenty of men who’ve been awed by your looks, your sensuality, your charms. I can’t imagine you ever having to try too hard, or being alone. You being here at all I just can’t think why. You’ll have your reasons, and I’ll not pry.
Erin:
I find that a lot of guys who would like to be with me are far too immature. I’ve always been attracted to the more intelligent male and I like older guys too as I feel I’m treated much better by them, though there are always exceptions to the rules. What about you?
Sam:
For me intelligence and looks only go so far, it’s who and how you are that really matters. You have something, you intrigue me, and if you don’t mind me saying, it sounds as if you’ve been let down a time or two? Men say they cannot help but be what they are, though some do try to be as women want, but I’ll not deny it isn’t always easy! Sorry, I’m probably talking too much?
Erin:
No, not at all. I don’t think you talk too much. I like reading what you have to say. It’s all so real and insightful, I feel as if I’m connecting with you and I’m enjoying it.
Monday
Sam:
I wonder how many lives your smile will light up today, how many pulses you will raise. How many will stumble for words on speaking to you, asking how you are, how your evening was, wishing they had been with you. I’m smiling now, thinking all these things too.
Erin:
You have made me smile that’s for sure – I wish I could be that infectious!
Sam:
You’ll think this a strange thing for me to say, but I feel your presence. Where my thoughts go you go too – us walking bare foot in the grass, our feet anointed by the sea as we stroll along a beach, hands held beneath a sky of blue… I know, I know, too much, too soon… to think of you like this.
Erin:
You know how to give me butterflies, don’t you? I enjoy your thoughts – I have the same sorts of things running through my mind too, though I don’t have the words to capture them as you do.
♦
Believing Sight Unseen
His and her stories written in message format
Have enough raw text for at least two distinct books using different pairs of characters – it’s just a matter of me sorting it!
Book One: Their Days – Sam & Erin’s Story
A May to September relationship – in terms of age gap and timeline.
Two characters Erin, age about 30; Sam, age about 50.
Interaction – predominately internet messaging – potential for email, phone text and ultimately dialogue.
Messages clearly defined as Sam or Erin – delineated by day starting on a Sunday in early May (contemporary, most of the raw messages were written in 2012 – 2014).
No formal chapters – time lined – Early May – Mid May – Late May and so on.
Expect to be novella length (~25,000 words of which ~ 11,000 edited to date)
Intention to be real and relatable – believable yet not predictable – to have readers feel for both Sam and Erin and want them to be together (despite or because of their flaws and misunderstandings).
An of today ‘will they – wont they’ story aiming to self-publish in June (July at the latest!)
Blogging ongoing edited story in ‘real time’ up until published – from today.
♦
[Hi Esther – I need to send you this! Catch up tomorrow – Eric]
